｡:.*･。*･ﾟ｡私のじんせいはおもしろくないです。*･ﾟ｡:.* ･ﾟ｡

I`m up early for no reason, so here`s a filler post. The most that`s really happened is my occasional hangouts with ヴァッシュ (might start calling him that instead of  オタク here since it`s his favorite character and it kind of suits his personality until I come up with a better alias). I bummed around his house all day yesterday, watched some movies,  he watched me fail at video games, we went out for a bit to eat and he let me steal his shirt to sleep in when he took me home.

I actually want this shirt .

My life has no real movement, it probably won`t until Summer. This Summer I`m more determined than ever to get my shit together and stop wasting my life by starting to drive again, getting my first job and taking a few summer courses.  Ideally I want to work in a bakery even if it`s just at a grocery storebut I`m desperate enough to clean, not desperate enough to work with children and might even try retail. I don`t even know how real job-hunting or interviews go but here goes.

 This semester was my 1st with 5 classes, it didn`t feel right and I don`t think it ever will but I`m going to do it. I also registered for Japanese 3 even though I feel like I`m terribly failing JP2. I really want to learn and I feel like I`m disappointing my teacher and myself after being so on top of it in JP1.  5 classes really threw me off but I have all Summer to catch up. Expect to see more JP here, it might be bad but I need to use it to remember it. Correct me if needed!!!

Lastly, I`ve been trying to do more self focus. Self in Art -(which I guess having so many self projects subtly sparked it up a little but it`s something I always come back to).

Might add 2 more later...

Physical Self- Very loosely. I want to get back on my health and my exercise.  I`ve been letting my skin recover by not wearing makeup and slowly letting my hair down.

Natural hair is one of the most beautiful but painful things in the world when it hasn`t been cared for.  I haven`t had a perm in 2-3yrs now but I haven`t been taking care of my hair either so yes I know it`s a mess.  It`s been weave and wigs most of my life. I love them and always will wear them but I feel like I`m wasting my hair. Like one day I`ll go completely bald from old age and hate myself for not taking care of it.  I`ve been walking around with afros and puffy ponytails on the weekends until I tame it.  I need to work on a regimen.

Hopefully back to Spiritual Self.

I have a ton of books on my shelf but that`s not enough. I want to go back to the AAS and they`re having something Sunday. I need to find a way to be there consistently though.

So that`s my boring life in a nutshell.

。*･ﾟ｡:.* ･ﾟ｡:.*･。*･ﾟ｡Time of Reflect。*･ﾟ｡:.* ･ﾟ｡:.*･。*･ﾟ｡

With all the added stress of school I haven`t really been focusing on my style at all as of lately. It does agitate me at times so once things settle down maybe I`ll start back up on trying to customize what I have and make more nail sets if nothing else. I don`t even go out anymore.

At times it`s a bit depressing not having any money to do things but the less I have the more resourceful I want to become. I`ve always had a dream in the back of my mind about living away from the city, owning very little, growing my own food, meditating, exercising and doing art all day. If I had the money I`d pack up and go on a retreat somewhere and maybe even just stay.

I guess what I`m trying to say is I`ve been reflecting on a lot and while I still love the Gal lifestyle I feel a little conflicted at times. I love the big hair, the long nails, the eyelashes, the extensions, learning to enhance my features, EVERYTHING!!!! And while I admire the girls who do get up every morning to do it or who have developed the skill to flawlessly apply makeup on every mode of public transportation out there, I didn`t start the style hoping to do it every single day and I do have an urge to go natural sometimes. Even being natural seems to cost more than every other lifestyle out there at times so that`s always been a big problem for me.

I`m going to really try to balance the two out. Maybe even take on some Rasuta/bgyaru, saike and over all experimental looks.

And ever since I went natural hair-wise at least 2+ years ago I wanted to lock my hair. Dreads are fucking expensive to maintain but well worth it, I love seeing sexy long dreads and they can be arranged however but if you don`t take care of them you will look like a hobo.  I want to be able to maintain it myself. I don`t want big dookie  dreads but I also don`t think I want sister locks.

 

Or hair like Crystal Kay`s

Or I could always rock a big fluffy fro...

My hair never seems to act right like any of the pictures I see though.

Lastly I just want some sort of control over my life. I`ve literally been floating around these passed 20 years , how I made it I can`t really tell anyone but I`m ready to get my shit together. No more floating through school, time to really use this expensive shit to my advantage