RAGING BEGINS (feel free to skip it)
Sooooooo did I mention my friends suck. THEY REALLY REALLY DO!!! I`m seriously thinking about not having any anymore. This week has not been my week, I`ve been raging my face off because I had 4 things canceled on me. It would be fine if people would cancel before I got ready but no, I always end up dressed up and ready to go then I get the
Oh hai there,insert bs hereI can`t make it message a few hours before I`m going to leave the house.
This passing weekend I was supposed to go back to the beach. At first I wasn`t even going to go because they abandoned me Saturday and rescheduled for Sunday. I had a bad feeling about it knowing them so at first I declined but decided to give them another chance and let them make up for it. They abandoned me again!!! It was for the dumbest reasons too. 1st my friend told me this big sob story about wanting to spend the whole day with his girlfriend because she was leaving for 4 days (not a few weeks, not a month or 2, 4 FUCKING DAYS!!!!) and they haven`t seen each other in awhile. REALLY?!
Call me a bitch or whatever but SERIOUSLY?! Don`t tell me "Saturday or something" like you freed the whole weekend up.
Bring the girl with you, you can walk up and down the beach with her all day. I promise won`t bother you. As a matter of fact, if she keeps you from being a complete asshole by dipping me in the water and fucking up my whole face after I worked on it for hours she`s more than welcome to come, we`re all friends anyway. Now the 2nd reason for canceling was it was supposed to rain but we had enough time to go for a few hours and there`s plenty of buildings to just chill, shop and eat in right next door until it`s over. In the end it didn`t even rain and even if it did I should be the one scared of it not a group of boys!!!!
Maybe it was a good thing it didn`t happen. My friends are asses and weaboos (not a very good combination at all). Don`t get me wrong, I love them to death but every time I plan something for them, do something nice for them or go out with them all HELL breaks loose or they just abandon me completely. On top of that they treat me like a ragdoll for being small. Now that I think about it I don`t feel safe around them with that much water because they don`t understand English 99.9% of the time or know when to stop (I would seriously be safer drowning myself to escape them).
RAGING ENDS (ok you can read now if you already haven`t started)
That aside I finally got out of the house.
I invited the guy I`ve been hanging out with lately to the beach when I was supposed to go Saturday but he couldn`t make it.
After hearing how shitty my luck has been lately he offered to turn it around by taking me out when he heard my plans got canceled with the weaboos (TWICE) but I thought I was still meeting up with my Gals Saturday and that got canceled too.
He said he wasn`t going to let me go through the week sad/upset so we postponed until Monday. I kind of wish Saturday went my way so I could`ve seduced him with my swimy-suit
hurrr hurr hurr
No not really, I`m not the seductive type at all, too awkward and shy.
I don`t know I just wanted to feel protected and then there`s that one REALLY awkward friend who thought there was something between us and it just didn`t work out so I would need a distraction
....I`m such a bad person.
Monday`s coord:
I`ve never thought about doing themed coords but I really enjoyed this one. It`s more color than usual. I tried to pile on the accessories (even though I forgot to put on my bracelets before the pic) because I like the way D.I.A`s staff does it but I need more belts and stuff. I actually borrowed the hat from my grandmother and now I want it. The woman has style.
Make-up Check/a little cam-whoring
Forgot to put on my contacts!!! >_<
Trying to balance out being fat by being even fatter in a healthier way...I LOVE FOOD!!!
Nice colored lenses really do make a big difference...lolz my makeup makes me look pissed/mischievous
I took a chance and tried to do banba, I tried pink eyeshadow this time but I highly doubt it shows in the pictures. I was a little worried because it was supposed to be 90+ but it always feels like death
. 1st time doing my makeup like this outside my house, I didn`t even consider his reaction to my over the top look today but he never seems to mind. I told him to google it before and he was all scared but after he saw it he really didn`t seem to mind. He actually expected more.
Last time we went out we saw the Hangover 2 (even though I didn`t see 1).
I usually watch strictly horror but I liked it. Afterwords, he drove me home and we ended up sitting in my driveway in his car rambling for 3hrs+. It was really weird, I just went to give him a hug goodbye and he somehow ended up grabbing me and not letting go.
My mom walked past and everything.
After some hours later the sun was rising, the birds were chirping and my mom finally realized we weren`t in the house. She finally called me so I went in. He texted me soon after asking if she said anything. So cute~
Originally we were just going to chill at his house with movies and some pizza but then he asked if I wanted to go bowling.
I honestly don`t go bowling a lot because I get tired of it easily but I decided to give it a try since it`s been awhile. The place was really nice, it had a game area, a bar and probably other stuff I didn`t notice. Little kids kept running up to me telling me they liked my outfit, hair and stuff. I could tell they were a little nervous to approach me at first but I was surprised they did, children just usually stare like this O.O (which they did at first).
Dai (that`s what I`m going to call him).
I`ve met some of his other friends before but it was when I was first starting out so I was a lot more toned down with the exception of my furry mouse hat. Yea they looked at me a little strange at first but after everyone started talking they liked me. They were all really funny and one was really bold and kept asking me if Dai was my type, would I date him and all kinds of stuff right in front of him.
One thing I like about Dai is he always makes sure I`m taken care of. Like when they ordered pizza he made sure it was vegetarian even though I wasn`t paying attention, he refuses to let me pay for anything no matter how hard I try to and he`s just always going out of his way to make sure I`m having a good time.
As expected the boys were really competitive and there was just me and another girl trying our best. I was tied with Dai at one point but then I got tired and just started rolling the ball just to roll it. After that we just cruised around and hung out in the parking lot of a little restaurant with his friends. Dai kept trying to buy me icecream and junk
but I`ve been binging on giant freshly baked chocolate chip cookies and icecream every night so I couldn`t do it. His friends just took over the parking lot dancing and goofing around.
Dai took me home and just like last time I gave him a hug goodbye and ended up in his arms probably longer than 3hrs. Towards the end he gave me a quick kiss but thinking of me he asked if I wanted a serious one. I couldn`t do it, I`m still a mentally/emotionally confused little kid when it comes to things like that.
And I don`t just randomly kiss people because I believe they`ll expect more. I do worry that things could be awkward between us from now on.
He makes it hard not to like him and I like being around him but I don`t want a relationship, I`m just not built for it. I can`t open up to people very easily and I have way too many complexes and insecurities
Sometimes I think I should just stop hanging out with him altogether because he`s told me he wants more than just friendship and always hints at being together but I dunno... I clearly told him that I don`t want a relationship but I don`t feel like he`s getting it. Am I just leading him on now or is he leading himself on?
